I had a dream the other night that they made a Night Vale movie and that Cecil was introduced with a very dramatic shot of him walking down the station hallway until it pans down and you see he’s wearing light-up sketchers
Imagine Night Vale insults though
"Yeah well the dog park wouldn’t even want you in it ooOooOooOOOOhhh"
"Were you born looking like that or did the librarians spit you out because you tasted too nasty?"
"Did Strex give you that smile because OH GOD MY EYEs, MY EYESSSS"
[freshman voice] middle schoolers
[cecil palmer voice] steve carlsberg
*whispers into the night* someone needs to write a fic where Cecil gets all sexually flustered by Carlos’ badboy behavior like eating toast, believing in mountains, and using pens
oKAY WHAT THE SHIT IS NIGHT VALE
Imagine if Cecil and Carlos had a child, and when they were growing up they declared that they wanted to work their way up in the radio station, “Just like daddy.” And Cecil is really smug and flattered until he realises what they would have to do.
HE DID NOT. HE DID /NOT/. KEVIN DID /NOT/ JUST CALL CARLOS /UGLY/.
THIS MEANS WAR, KEVIN.